In the chemo ring: rounds 2 and 3

Hi there

Sorry not to have posted earlier, have found chemo 2 and now 3 very tiring and quite gruelling. Still that's me now halfway through so the end of the treatment programme is in sight!

For chemo 2, I was accompanied by 2 best friends, Susan and Nicky who livened up the proceedings with Christmas dressing up, horoscope reading and of course the quintessential general girlie 'putting the world to rights' chat! Evidence of silly hat wearing below...

and of Nicky testing out her Santa outfit before it gets 'halved' for her lovely Café Cognito (if you visit there before Christmas you'll see the final product on the ceiling!)

For chemo 3, another best friend, Donna joined me and regaled me with tales of teenage parenting which had us both crying with laughter... She was also witness to the 'small' bag of take home drugs which leave with me after each session!

The last few weeks have been a rollercoaster emotionally - in true festive style, I think I have been each of the 7 dwarfs i.e. grumpy, sleepy, happy, dozey, bashful, dopey etc.

I think I'm still me somewhere in amongst all this 'chaos' though - as you can see from the pic above taken in early December when I was I'm celebrating my friend's special birthday. On that day the 'wig' got its first official outing and yes that is a glass of bolly in my hand although its only 9.30 in the morning so although it was serious Gaviscon to follow, I did manage a drink which as you will know is very me!!

Not least were the school Christmas plays, where both of my gorgeous boys did a fantastic job (Elliot's highly comic performance as an ugly step sister was a moment that will lift me every time I think about it... yes that's him with the big blonde wig!)

So only a short post today to keep you up to date and to let you know that I'm hanging on in there... thank you so so so much for all the hugs, texts, emails, cards, flowers, wonderful food parcel deliveries and very generous gifts as well as your humour, energy, patience and support...

I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas and New Year and I can't thank you enough for all your support to date,

with much love

Skerry
xxx

PS Here's a link to a page again, please don't feel obliged at all, its just that a few folk have asked me again about how to: Post a comment to this blog. If it doesn't work, pls email and let me know :)

3 shaves in 8 days...!!!

So its a week to the day that muchos Reserva Rioja was consumed in order to muster some Dutch Courage in order to get the hair cut that was required due to chemo drugs taking their inevitable toll on my long grown, highlighted blonde locks that I've maintained for the last 20 something years (the cheek of it when I consider that I've spent enough on it at SAKS to be a major shareholder!)

Husband Michael offered and I initially hesitated but then agreed as long as he only had one drink beforehand! I meantime had at least 3 glasses, which made for a very drunken Skerry due to have only having drunk 2 glasses of wine in what seems like an eternally long alcohol free spell! (A big thank you to Julia and Annie for getting me drunk the Saturday night the week before ;) Just 2 glasses - I was a cheap date eh?!)

So above is Michael's practice run (yes he did a half head for effect and then the whole lot as a number 1 and that was in the afternoon well before a drink!)

Its taken me a while but I've decided to share the pics... it started with a Phil Oakey look,

then a number 7,

Then a number 4, then to my final cut - a number 2,

Which resulted in the ceremonial wearing of the lovingly 'hand knitted by my mother' hats, thanks Mum :) accompanied by yes of course, more Rioja!

 

So I've now taken to wearing a selection of hats (favourite one is currently a red VANS hat which Elliot says is the only thing that's made me a cool mum -at last I think to myself, all it took was a hat!!)

So to the 3rd and last head shave of the week, due to take place tomorrow (Sun 30th Nov) for my friend Alex, who's getting his hair shaved by his daughter Lizzy to raise funds for Breast Cancer Care:
https://www.justgiving.com/nomorehairscotland

I promised to publicise his grand haircut on my blog, so its over to you Alex now that you've nearly completed your haircuts countdown on Facebook... I am very humbled that you're doing this for me and others going through this that you know.... do send me a pic as evidence once its done! (And surely my wig has to be better than your one??!!)

love

Skerry
xx

Wee update...

Just a wee update to say I'm doing well - this week has been good and a few things have happened in the last few days which I thought might give you a giggle so here goes...

Tuesday I had a fitting for a prosthesis, aka chicken fillet - yes I am now the proud owner of my very own silicone! Not quite the 36DD one had hoped for but then apparently the Dolly Parton style reconstruction is an option for next year once my body has calmed down from the chemo.

It all went very well, the lady that does the fitting at the hospital has a room that's setup like a department store fitting room, i.e. not the clinical environment that I was expecting. Susan came with me and we judged the various options proffered - think I ended up with the smallest size they had!

I wore it all day and felt almost normal (well, that's based on my usual scale of crazy!) - so much so that it led to an incident in the evening...

Went to my first yoga class in 8 years, forgot I was wearing said prosthesis and when I did a 'table top' or 'dancing dog' (can't remember which but suffice to say I had both legs and arms straight and my back was supposed to be straight!) my prosthesis made a public appearance (need a name for this one Morag...) peeking out from the top of my crop top/teeny bra thing! I decided it was best to remove it and hide it under my sweatshirt which was lying on the floor behind me. Once I had stopped shaking with laughter (silently as the class was in a 'relaxed and meditative state') and resumed downward dog, the instructor then 'helpfully' moved my sweatshirt off my mat which meant prosthesis made a second public appearance! She said oops, I said it was ok and this resulted in her being embarrassed and me having a second fit of the giggles (again in a room full of people being silent, which always makes you laugh more!)

Wednesday I saw the oncologist who was very pleased that I arrived in his office smiling - his view is that I'm doing really well for week 2 and he, the nurse and I had a good laugh about the yoga prosthesis incident :) He's going to prescribe me more drugs (more!!) to try and reduce the nausea and the heartburn for the next round but overall was really pleased with my progress after chemo 1 to date :)

I'm going to write more later today but meantime, check out this video of my very cool boy (edit done by his friend Sam - apparently the last trick is Elliot's best yet - turn up the volume LOUD!)

#affaproudmum :)

Getting better everyday...

Just a quick update to say that now I'm on day 9 and every day feel better and better - nausea is all but gone and apart from constantly being on temperature watch (nurse has got me obsessed with checking my temperature so am now the proud owner of 2 thermometers) not sleeping well (clearly more drugs required so off to phone GP shortly) eating gargantuan amounts frequently and feeling a little spaced out... I'm on the up!

So much so that I even managed to attend last night's John Lewis Xmas shopping evening and spend a few hours with Millie - my lovely mum in law, as evidenced by our meeting Monty...

Have to confess we did try a 'selfie', failed miserably and so harangued a well dressed passer by to take this on my phone! Amanda, hope you're nae greetin'....?? ;)

Did I get lots of pressies bought? Well of course not - but I did treat myself to a lovely red cashmere scarf (cancer perk!), a cuddly bear hat (feel that a photo will be honour bound to be taken once its had its first outing) and some 'headgear' to wear soon for the inevitable falling locks... all still here at the mo but I suspect not for much longer. Jules, you'll be pleased to know I nearly purchased several pairs of boots in one go, but they didn't have any in my size so the 12 pairs in an hour in Madrid record still stands :)

So overall all good - bookings now being taken for coffees, lunches, catch ups whenever you are free - not sure how I'll ever find time to work again ;)

Skerry
x

In the ring with Chemo - round 1...

OK so its official, chemo does make you feel rubbish!

Monday I had bloods taken and I also had a heart scan and ECG. Heart scan was pretty cool (although they had just had new software installed so it took a while - I did wonder if that might be an opportunity for electra to offer training for the medical sector!)

Results were all fine so went in @ 12.30 on Wed for chemo, as planned. Two lovely nurses took me through it, Mary and Shirley (one of them has the surname Savage, made me feel right at home Claire) who patiently sat pumping 4 types of drug in via my hand, one at a time, till 3pm.  Pleased to say that didn't feel anything particularly odd but just very tired towards the end. We had a few giggles and I had a few tears, I think mostly down to the fact that this is the treatment that I was dreading most. I've attached a wee pic right to show how civilised it was - yes I am on the bed holding court as usual ;)

Felt very nauseous that first night with a sore head, took one of the four (yes, four) anti-sickness drugs they've given me, nicknamed Dom Perignon by the nurses as its easier to remember, so that name will do me just fine too plus give me something to look forward to when fizz is an option again! The bag I got home should have me rattling for weeks. The most extreme one is an anti-schizo drug, prescribed in quarters for nausea (but I may take a whole one when the voices start!!).... never a dull...

Day 2 - I felt fine (thought 'this is easy') and managed to go into town and have lunch with Michael (already the 'long suffering' having to put up with me and this is only chemo 1 of 6!) but days 3 and 4 have been like having the worst hangover I've ever had and without the good time preceding it which makes a hangover worthwhile :(

Day 3  - On waking up felt horrendous, thus became an official couch potato and felt quite grim until the day was brightened up by an avalanche of texts and emails and especially by a visit from Louise, home this week from Calgary who helped me cheer me up - thank you Louise :) Cravings also kicked in big time - salt and vinegar crisps anyone? The incessant nausea takes me back to being pregnant when eating little and often seemed to be the cure.

Day 4 (yesterday) - still felt horrendous. At the end of the afternoon I ventured out for the follow up appointment to buy a wig, another tick on the list so we'll see how that works out at the appropriate time. Daniel woke me up this morning and asked if I was wearing it already - I can only assume he was commenting on how glamorous I looked today (i.e. not!!) or how similar the wig looks to current hair (yes I've played it safe\sane and haven't gone for any Lady GaGa madness, although it may only be a matter of time \ or if I decide to up the schizo drugs and \ or decide to visit Geneva as they have a fabulous wig shop there as discovered by brother in law Stephen who sent me a fab clip via YouTube).

So here I am on Day 5, onwards and upwards is what I'm hoping, although I do think that each day the general state of feeling rubbish is improving marginally or that's what I'm telling myself...:) As quoted yesterday, 'may the force be with me'... That I felt like updating this blog makes me think I must be improving...

So to end on a note of interest\amusement, I've created an additional page today to give you a show of the wig samples - it was interesting trying on different styles. Yes one did make me look like my mother (aargghh and sorry Dzid) so as that short do is likely to happen at some point next year, no prizes for guessing which one I went for :)

An enormous and heart felt thank you to all of you supporting me and sending me your positive thoughts, they are needed and really are very much appreciated :) :) Every single message, email, post, comment and text really does help keep my spirits up,

Will update again in the next few days or so,

Skerry
xxx

Autumn Wigfest!

So here's a few samples for a viewing and a giggle... cast your vote if you want to, I can always buy a few more ;)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And that's the last of the seven!

 

And so to chemo...

Sorry it's been a while since I posted anything - its been a strange kind of limbo up and down past few weeks but at least I've got a chemo start date now of 5th November.

Took off to Edinburgh and Loch Lomond last week for the school holidays to chill out with the boys - took a trip on a sea plane across the loch... 

 

drank plenty of malbec ...

and generally tried to relax...

 

I've recovered well from the surgery but if honest would probably rather go through another operation than go through chemo but am going to have just get on with it and focus on the outcome...

 

So its a dizzy itinerary of flu jab, wig fitting and blood tests prior to next Wed - affa exciting eh!

 

If I was to try and describe the head crank of getting this disease, the best I could probably do at the mo is to say that its like trying to reframe your future i.e. what you thought was normal now has to be defined as a new normal and due to my usual level of impatience I wish I knew what the new normal will be NOW! I realise that time will be a great healer and so amongst the many lessons I'm learning is that I need to develop more patience and enjoy the 'now' - oft said but less practiced...every day I try and focus on small 'treasures' and coincidences and that's probably as close as I can get to articulating my weird and wonderful thought processes of the mo :) Enough of the philosophy!

 

Great day yesterday, spent the day kind of 'working' (yes I know I'm supposed to be off) but I was just being kept in the loop about what's going on and I really really enjoyed it. So much so, brace for impact my lovely 'team electra' cos I'm coming in for a cuppie and a visit Monday :) :)

 

There were lots of lovely texts and messages to try and catch up on (sorry if I'm late getting back to you, I will get there) and then watched Elf (all time best Christmas movie ever!) with the boys and I laughing out loud at all the eminently quotable lines we repeat to each other every year, I'm singing/I'm in a store/and I'm siiiiiingiiiiing!/I'm in a store/and I'm siiiiiingiiiiing!  and of course SANTA! OH MY GOD! SANTA'S COMING! I KNOW HIM! I KNOW HIM!

 

so with only 57 days to Christmas...

 

Will post again after next week's first Chemo session (unless of course the Wig Fitting episode is particularly good which I suspect it will be but those pics may have to remain censored!)

 

love

 

Skerry

xx

 

PS I just like to smile! Smiling's my favourite :) I could now be really cheesy and ask you to smile at someone today - as someone once told me "Thou shall smile and have a nice day for it confounds those who have other plans for thee".

 

 

 

 

How to Post a Comment for me!

Thanks to Donna and Morag for this one - I've combined both their instructions on how to post a comment onto this blog (with options to either remain anonymous or add your name to the posting)....

• At the bottom of your text, where it says '2 comments', click on '2 comments' as if you wanted to read them.
• After the most recent comment is a freeform text box called 'Enter your comment'.  So, enter your comment! (hard this, isn't it?!!)
• Below the comment box you are asked to 'Select Profile'.  Click on the dropdown, and select 'Anonymous' (make sure you have signed your name at the end of your comment, so people know who you are - unless of course you want to remain anonymous!!)
• OR
• Choose Name/URL from the drop down and then type your name into the 'Name:' field (you can leave the 'URL:' field empty).
• Click on the 'Publish' button, and you will see a Preview and be asked to 'Prove you are not a robot', by entering the text/number shown in the picture that has appeared.
• Type in this text, and hit 'Publish' again.
• Et Voila!  Comment is posted.

Thanks ladies :)

x

 

PS If these steps don't help you, email and let me know (and then remind me a I'm a trainer by trade ;) !!)

Update from the Oncology Appointment

Hi there, just a wee update from the last few days - feeling better every day since the second op, arm movement is improving but am still quite tired and on the pain relief :(

I saw the Oncologist on Wednesday and the good news is that he said by having had the mastectomy it means in theory my statistics are 65-70% chance that I'm cured for a long time. By also undertaking chemotherapy followed by taking tamoxifen for 10 years (a bit of a treatment list!) it increases the number to 85% - which is a great number! I also don't need to have radiotherapy which is a real bonus.

So now the boys are on school holidays we're hoping to maybe get a few days away to relax and spend some time together and then the chemotherapy is due to start on either 5th or 12th November, subject to feeling well enough. Reading through the information they've given me makes me think that this may be the hardest part of treatment based on all the potential side effects it can cause.

Meantime I'm taking it a day at a time and trying to get one or two things done each day which can be anything from a few emails to going out for lunch. Last Friday was mum's birthday so I was delighted to celebrate it with close friends from Aberdeen, Edinburgh and Stavanger (cancer perks you see!) at a gorgeous girlie lunch as evidenced below. Plus it was the first outing for my temporary prosthesis (had to remove half the padding so I didn't look completely lop sided!) which has now been christened 'Betty' by the girls)...

I feel very lucky to be surrounded by such amazing family and friends throughout the last few weeks - thank you to everyone who has sent me texts, cards, emails, food and flowers, you are lovely and I do appreciate all your positive thoughts... please keep 'em coming :)

Onwards and upwards - till next time,

love
Skerry
xx

PS One thing that would be really helpful for me is some advice - if you have managed to post a comment successfully to this blog (without having a gmail account) and found it easy - could you email me your instructions and I'll post them on as a few folk have given me feedback that they couldn't post a comment, that would be really helpful, thank you...

Good News!

Quick update - had my follow up appointment with the surgeon last night as my second pathology report results were back (quick eh!) He used the word 'excellent' when going through the results as he described that no more cancerous cells were found in the breast tissue or lymph nodes he removed. He was also really pleased with how well my wound is healing. To say that I was delighted to hear all this may be the understatement of the year. It also looks like I won't need to have radiotherapy either which is ideal. So I should hear today about an appointment with the oncologist for next week to find out all about chemo and when it starts etc.

love to you all from a very happy Skerry :)

PS a big thank you to Louise and Neil (my lovely friends in Calgary) who sent me this yesterday which produced a huge smile on my part (as you can see from the measurement lines they know me well!) I feel pretty certain that it'll be christened with red wine very soon...

First blog post from Devonshire Sofa Central...

Dear friends, first 'test' blog today so here goes!

A very belated first day of school term proud mum pic of my wonderful boys attached...

plus photo below (taken by Georgina 'Bailey' Wright) of my totally amazing hand crocheted blanket (created by the very talented Morag Wishart, thank you honey) which is currently used daily in my new capacity as ‘professional’ couch potato...

So having made the mistake of opening up my email account and the camera card at the same time, been at this for a while and think I now need another lie down and more pain relief!

On the update front, still very sore and tired. On the docs advice yesterday I changed the Tramadol to Dihydrocodeine which gives me a weird spaced out feeling but I'm in much better fettle. Tramadol made me very down and a real nightmare patient for Michael and my mum who's staying at the mo - no there hasn't been a murder but they've had a few daughter\wife from hell 'moments' as I'm not an easy patient (which I know many of you will be laughing at as you expected this already!!) however both Michael and Mum are doing a really fab job of putting up with \ helping me :)

The care nurse did say that I would need to really take it easy this time due to the mastectomy being a bigger op than the lumpectomy and being under general anaesthetic twice in less than a month. Easy for her to say but am so tired at the mo can't do much anyway...

Managed a very short walk to Nicky's new coffee shop 'Cognito' at the end of the road once this week and it was very tiring but worthwhile (scones to die for!) Due to my tiredness creating a goldfish span of attention, I have indeed become a TV addict and am working my way through Game of Thrones series 4 and a US comedy series called 'Community' - thank goodness for Lovefilm and Netflix. Julia's going to drop off a box of West Wing DVD's this week as it comes highly recommended. Can't recommend a WLD in the afternoon highly enough ;)

Now just waiting to hear from the consultant about an appointment for this week or next to go through the second pathology report and then hopefully get a date to meet the oncologist to find out about starting chemo which should definitely start within 3-4 weeks. Its been exactly two months since diagnosis, which I would describe as having been weirdly a both strange and wonderful time.

For the record, I'm not bothered about losing a breast, let's face it I didn't have much anyway in that department and its a really small price to pay if it gets rid of the cancer and keeps it away.

This afternoon was a second post hospital snail's pace outing, this time to the school to wave Elliot off on his P7 trip to Dalguise for his activity week. Delighted to report he packs just like his mother (i.e. everything plus kitchen sink in rucksack!). It doesn't seem like minutes since I was waving him off on his first nursery trip 8 years ago so there's bound to be a repeat of the Kleenex moment from me but this time resulting in total embarrassment from him (well as my friend Claire always says, if we're not embarrassing them we're not doing our job properly!).

A really massive thank you for all your supportive emails, text messages and cards, they are very very much appreciated I can assure you so please keep 'em coming in spite of this new 'blogging' gadget!

Looks like you can post comments on this blog too so feel free to try it out and we can learn this new technology together. Tell me if there's anything obvious I've missed, settings to change or questions you'd like to ask etc.

The wonder that is my friend Nicky has just arrived with scones fresh out of the oven so eating beckons once again - this is now also a daily high frequency activity I may add... (it's replaced the now non existent wine consumption....yes shocking I know).

So onwards and upwards, sending lots of love to you all

Skerry

x

Probably won't do this everyday as this has worn me out this morning but will try and do an update at least once a week if this goes ok...

PS a huge thank you to you Becky in Perth, Australia for setting this blog up for me - supporting me from over 4000 miles away, fantastic :)